Kym Dakin, Yarmouth: Occupy Monopoly
I’m not a very competitive person. I lose patience and interest with games that go on and on…except maybe Scrabble, but that’s not that story.
This story goes back to the 80s in a cramped apartment in New York with three grumpy guys and me, who were dating one of the grumpy guys. We had all spent the evening consuming beer, wine, pot…everything that wasn’t nailed down.
Around midnight, Jay – Big Competitive Game Guy – released his favorite game – Monopoly.
Everyone moans. We all knew that no one could beat Jay in any game, especially this one. But it was Jay’s apartment, his beer, and, unless we wanted to call it a night (there’s a clue!) it was Jay’s call. It was monopoly.
Our game that night progressed quite predictably at first. We have all purchased a few properties. I got excited about scoring a railroad AND a power company. Right away, Jay bought big red hotels, as always. We took turns landing in jail, but we all managed to rack up at least some lower class money. Jay, of course, had the Midas touch and started waving his stack of $500 bills in our faces.
Around 2am, I realized I was going to lose. Still. But this time, I decided to go all out on OCCUPY MONOPOLY. I had bought the cheap stuff – Mediterranean and Baltic Avenues – and somehow (a Bank “loan” may have been involved) acquired Boardwalk and Park Place! I then announced that this whole area would be a nature reserve – tents only.
Jay’s mouth opened. The other two suddenly sat up.
” You can not do that ! “That’s not how it’s played!” “What the (expletive)?!”
It was getting fun now.
Something about a nature preserve on a Monopoly board just made these guys outraged. Realizing this, I decided to do something unusual for me. I was going to play to WIN.
There was no limit in this quest. Nothing was on the table. I channeled my inner Robin Hood. Some extra “loans” (or “community grants”, actually) from the Bank when someone went to the kitchen to drink beer, a few hotels somehow “slipped” on Marvin Gardens and wouldn’t you know, the Monopoly Gods smiled on me! I had a few lucky ones thanks to the Community Chest and I no longer ended up in prison. Although now my ill-gotten loan/grant amount is in the thousands of dollars. Jay, to his sullen frustration, has landed behind bars more than once.
I outlived Tom, who refueled around 3 a.m., and my guy Jim crashed into the La-Z-Boy, snoring at 4 a.m.
It was Jay and me. We played again and again.
Finally, I saw his shoulders slump in defeat as dawn tickled the windowsill.
I had won. And the Boardwalk-Park Place Nature Preserve was still standing.